The Kindness of Candor

<p>&ldquo;My dear friend, sometimes you sound holier than you really are.&rdquo;</p> <p>Those words were leveled with a direct gaze and gentle smile. Had they come from someone other than a close friend and mentor whose discernment I highly valued, my feelings might have been hurt. Instead, I winced and laughed at the same time, knowing that while his words &ldquo;hit a nerve,&rdquo; he was also right. Sometimes when I talked about my faith, I used jargon that didn&rsquo;t sound natural, which gave the impression that I wasn&rsquo;t being sincere. My friend loved me and was trying to help me be more effective in sharing with others what I genuinely believed. Looking back, I see it as some of the best advice I ever received.</p> <p>&ldquo;Wounds from a friend can be trusted,&rdquo; Solomon wisely wrote, &ldquo;but an enemy multiplies kisses&rdquo; (Proverbs 27:6). My friend&rsquo;s insights demonstrated the truth of that counsel. I was grateful he cared enough to tell me something I needed to hear, even though he knew it might not be easy to accept. Sometimes when someone tells you only what they think you want to hear, it isn&rsquo;t helpful, because it can keep you from growing and developing in vital ways.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</p> <p>Candor can be kindness, when measured out with genuine, humble love. May God give us the wisdom to receive it and impart it well, and so reflect His caring heart.</p>