Love, Lust and Laughter - 07.27.21

<p>Getting Back Out There – Part 2</p> <p style="font-weight:400;">Dr. Ashley Mader (<a href='http://www.ourshine.org/'>www.ourshine.org</a>) returned to talk with Dr. Diana about how to mentally prepare to return to the dating scene. The trick is to find the right balance of having fun, not coming off too desperate, and being yourself – which is no easy task. So how do singles mentally prepare to date?</p> <p style="font-weight:400;"> </p> <p style="font-weight:400;">Be present. “I always live in the present. The future I can’t know. The past I no longer have.” – <a href='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fernando_Pessoa'>Fernando Pessoa</a></p> <p style="font-weight:400;">Be present with friends. Engage in conversations and genuinely listen to understand, not just to respond. Being present helps focus your energy on the things that matter right now.</p> <p style="font-weight:400;"> </p> <p style="font-weight:400;">Consider therapy. Dr. Ashley offers a free 20-minute consultation via telehealth. If the potential client wants to continue, it will become a full hour therapy session. Here are some other resources for accessing therapy, either in person or online: <a href='https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists'>Psychology Today directory of therapists</a>, <a href='https://www.betterhelp.com/'>BetterHelp.com</a>, and <a href='https://www.talkspace.com/'>TalkSpace.com</a>. Getting mental health support is healthy, and can help you work on yourself before or while you’re looking for love.</p> <p style="font-weight:400;"> </p> <p style="font-weight:400;">Read a book. “Think before you speak. Read before you think.” – <a href='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fran_Lebowitz'>Fran Lebowitz</a></p> <p style="font-weight:400;">Many self-help books have advice on how to change your love life: for example, by noticing the patterns about your last choices. Also, learning more about your wants and needs is important. A classic book is <a href='https://www.amazon.com/Love-Languages-Secret-that-Lasts/dp/0802412