Ep 268: How to Convince Stubborn Teens

<p>Michael McQueen, author of <em>MindStuck</em>, dives into the science of persuading stubborn teenagers, and reveals why the tactics parents typically use to influence our kids simply don't work.</p><p></p><p>If you've enjoyed Talking to Teens, we'd love if you could leave us a five-star rating, and if you have time, a review! </p><p><strong>Full Show Notes</strong></p><p>Trying to convince a stubborn teenager to see things your way can feel impossible at times. They seem completely stuck in their perspectives, unwilling to listen to reason or logic. So how do we get through when teen minds seem closed off?</p><p>According to our guest Michael McQueen, the root of the issue lies in outdated persuasion tactics. When trying to sway teens, most parents rely on giving information, evidence and rational arguments. But as Michael explains, this only taps into one small part of the brain–the rational, thinking prefrontal cortex.</p><p>The majority of our decisions and viewpoints are actually shaped by a more impulsive, instinctual part of the brain. For teens, who are still developing cognitively, this portion of the brain wields even more influence. So if we want to change a teen’s mind, we have to learn what truly motivates it.</p><p><strong>The Teenage Brain</strong></p><p>In his book “Mind Stuck,” Michael refers to the two processing centers of the brain as the “inquiring mind” and the “instinctive mind.” The inquiring mind takes in information and analyzes it logically before coming to conclusions. But for most people, only around 5-10% of decisions happen here.</p><p>The instinctive mind is much faster, making snap judgments based on emotions, biases and self-preservation. This is the mind that judges whether someone is in our “tribe,” and causes us to have gut reactions. For teens with underdeveloped prefrontal cortexes, nearly all decisions happen via the instinctive mind.</p><p>So when parents offer rational arguments to change teens’ behavior, teens brush them off–because facts and data barely penet